Update.

So!!! 3 out of 4 jobs quit. Ok, one I was fired from, but for bullshit reasons. And may have been a blessing in disguise. And their reason was CRAP. I tell them when I'm not available... and yet they call me on those days... then bitch about my availability. REALLY? But not worried about it at all!

Today was my last day with the elderly man with Parkinsons.  I walked away so sad though.  He's almost become a grandpa to me, and I would love to keep in touch.  I told his daughter to call me if ever in a pinch..but he's the type I would love to drop in on.... unpaid!  He feels like family...if that makes sense?  We'll see what evolves into?  I don't wanna drop in and upset the family?  We'll see... we'll see...

So I start on Friday as a NURSE with a new agency.  Which may require a train commute.  Who the hell am I???  A TRAIN??  I sound like a big girl, huh? lol.  But seriously.. the pay is great and I'm looking at possibly working sunday-thursday.  The pay on Sunday is amazing...

But...

I'm so scared.

I haven't worked as a nurse in like five months.... and everything is so different here!   Tylenol is Paracetamol.  It's a whole new world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**deep breaths**

I know I can do it, but I just feel I will be overwhelmed in the beginning.  And the fact that I NEED sponsorship to STAY here is ALWAYS in the back of my mind!   My folks come in Feb (which I soooooooooooooooooooo cannot wait for!! I miss them more than I can put in writing!!!) and if I'm still with agency then, it could be good... cause I make my own hours.  But July is staring at me (end of July 2012 is when my visa expires!  Yeah, moving internationally is NOT that easy!) and I really want things to tie up!

In other news, not much to report!  Life is good.  Still dealing with some other "shit".  Shit that I should NOT be having to deal with.  At all.  But what do you do?  You decide if the person you are with is worth it and go from there. I'm a big quote girl, and I once read "God will never give you more than you can handle.  I just wish he didn't trust me so much".  And it's soooo true. I really wish he didnt' trust me this much, because I'm really on the border of how much shit I can take.  I think that realistically it would take just one more ounce on my load for me to just crumble and fall.

We'll see how the next few weeks develop.  I can say without hesitation that I love Wayne with everything I have, and cannot imagine myself without him.  He is my everything.  And I know my true friends understand this, and say how they've never seen me THIS happy.  We talked today about the good times we've had.  And good lord, we've had some amazing times.  If I had to write it all out (in regards to our fun times) I would run out of paper and ink.   And it's so amazing to me that the best friend I confided EVERYTHING in, is the one I love.  I mean, the shit I confided in him is enough to make any other guy RUN in the other direction?!!!?

Anyways, we are now over the hump, and although he won't be home to sleep tomorrow night (sleep study before surgery) I still get to see him, and feel his arms around me.  Which is, the most amazing thing in the world.

Until next time...