Career April.. is bipolar.

And I hate it.  It's awesome!

 

(see what I did there? haha)

 

Soooo.  I am quite conflicted this week on my career.  I've busted by ass for over 13 years to get where I am now.  One on hand I'm at the highest I have ever been career wise.  I am on my highest salary ever.  I have directors, but am "the boss".  I have the enjoyment when I over hear comments of how much my staff love having me as a boss (at times when they didnt' even know I was in the office) and the feedback the doctors in my clinic have given my directors.  The patients all seem so much happier, and because I was the nurse for so long, they all know me.  I have a really good memory so when I see patients come in the office that I know, I always speak "hello Mr. so-and-so!"  Or if I forgot their name, "hello!!  how are you!"  and I will often sit and have a quick chat.  It's that good old American customer service.  You don't get overly good service here in Australia.  And that's not me being partial to America.  Any Australian will tell you that.  But me?  I strive to deliver the best.  I have always had the ability to "click" with my patients, and remember details about most of them.  Part of it is I have a really good memory.  The other part is I take pride in my nursing and truly do care about my patients.

 

All in all, it's all going well.  So what's the problem?   All the behind the scene responsibilities.  The never ending meetings, conference calls, spreadsheets, budgeting and financial planning, business strategy planning and development...... juggling fifteen things at once..... wearing a thousand hats over the course of an hour (and remembering to eat lunch!! lol)  Which as a nurse, I'm use to.  However, this is on a different level.   The feeling that you haven't accomplished a damn thing.  I am not bringing it home as much anymore in terms of I don't feel like I am bringing the stress and frustration home.  There for a while I felt like I stayed stressed and...well.. bitchy at home.  I still do bounce things off of Wayne at home.  That's for a couple reasons.  Number one, we were friends for so long, that I still am able to turn off our relationship and feel like I'm just chatting with a very dear friend and I don't mean that in a bad way!    I mean it in a very complimentary way.  I respect his opinion and value it very much I have friends who don't have that friendship with their partner and cant' talk to them about those type of things, so in that regards, I'm so blessed.  And also because unlike me, Wayne is very level headed... and as a guy, he doesn't have to deal with certain times of the month when you aren't thinking as clearly as you should.. if you catch my drift!! LOL!  

 

Then there's the whole managing an entire office of employees.  It's hard to develop thick skin and not take criticism to heart.  It's hard to come down on employees when you think "ahh.  I should let that go" but then think "but will that start to cause habits".  It's trying not to play favorites, which I think I have been successful at.  Then again, I have an awesome team and love them all so it's not hard to treat them equal when they all are awesome!

 

Basically for the first time since the promotion, all five days of this past week I have had thoughts that I have made a mistake.  Which is sad for me because the two weeks prior I was the most comfortable I had been since the promotion in October.  (October!???!!!!  Damn.  Time flies!)  I felt like I was finally making my way.  Like things were finally making sense.  I refuse to make any rash decisions and step down just because I had a bad week.  I know I just need to give it time and see what develops.

 

In other news, we have our engagement party this weekend.  Looking like 50-60+ people coming.  And the forecast???  42C!!! (108F folks.... and THAT is hot!!).  It's gonna be a scorcher!

 

Wedding stuff is coming along.  Not a lot of new stuff.  Wayne is away next week with work and the following week we meet with 4 DJ companies.  After we decide on the DJ, we are then looking at possibly a photo booth.  My BM, Sasha, and I went to a bridal expo a few weeks ago and there was one there you could use at no charge.  We did, and LOVED it.  Since then I've heard from a lot of people who have been to weddings lately that had them and they have told me how much fun they had with it and how everyone seemed to really enjoy.  So, after the DJ is sorted I am gonna do some data collecting to compare price and such to determine if we want to use this.  After using it at the expo, I'm all for it.  But we'll see.  :)   I am enjoying all the planning and don't feel stressed about it... yet! LOL!  I'm sure that will come soon enough.  There isn't a lot of do it your self stuff that we are doing.  But yeah, it's all coming together quite nicely, and through all the planning stages Wayne has been fantastic.  It's been an enjoyable process.  And will be here before we know it!   Less than 8 months to go now! 

Ending with my beloved Kenny Chesney Lyrics that fit my life at the moment very much!!

"The Woman With You"

She hit the door 6:55 sack full of groceries split down the side.
Can goods scattered all the way to the curb.
Look on her face saying don't say a word.
So, it's me and her and a can of beans sitting there on the front porch swing.
Western sky all turning red.
Head on my shoulder she sighed and said:

Been gopherin, chauffeuring, company chairman.
Coffee maker, Copy repairman.
Anymore there ain't nothing I swear man that I don't do.
Been juggling, struggling, closing big deals.
Dancing backwards in high heels.
Just when it feels like i can't make it through.
She said it sure is nice to just be the woman with you

She said the girl I was with the business degree probably wouldn't recognize me.
I was gonna run the bank.
I was gonna run the math.
Now all I want to run is a bubble bath.Back then you know I had this plan.
Before all of this reality set in.
Here comes life boy ready or not.
Hey I wanted it all and that's what I got.
Cause I'm gopherin, chauffeuring, company chairman.
Coffee maker, Copy repairman.
Anymore there ain't nothing I swear man that
I don't do.
Been juggling, struggling, closing big deals.
Dancing backwards in high heels.
Just when it feels like I can't make it through.
She said it sure is nice to just be the woman with you.

She said I'm gopherin,chauffeuring, company chairman.
Coffee maker, Copy repairman.
Anymore there ain't nothing I swear man that I don't do.
Been juggling, struggling, closing big deals.
Dancing backwards in high heels.
Just when it feels like I can't make it through.
She said it sure is nice to just be the woman the woman with you.
La, la, la, la, la, la

The woman with you